Funny Wedding Toasts
By Anna Sibal
No one really knows exactly why, but most funny wedding toasts at a wedding reception are done by the best man. It is most likely because he shares a strong camaraderie with the groom, and to some extent the bride, and he was probably the closest witness to how the groom went through in his courtship of the bride. He is probably an insider to the ups and downs of the couple’s initial relationship prior to the wedding. Because of his special vantage point, he can definitely see a lot of funny things about the couple that the couple themselves may not realize.
Here is a typical funny toast given by the best man in a wedding:
"As Randy’s best friend, I have got to ask this of you, Sarah: Just what did you do to my buddy? Before he met you, he’s a great guy. He used to hang out a lot with the boys just to chill out, maybe play some soccer or shoot some hoops. No one can make him bother to dress neatly, and he is always late, even for work. Randy does not even do his laundry until his wardrobe reaches critical point, which means he does not have any more clean underwear.
"But when you came into his life, Sarah, he changed. He combs his hair now and dresses neatly. He even does his own laundry now – with a washing machine, mind, and not by paying someone else to do it. You have changed Randy, Sarah. You have made our boy into a better man, and for that, we thank you."
Funny wedding toasts are not limited to the best man, though. Actually, anyone can give a funny toast at a wedding if they have a mind to it. But next to the best man, another typical funny man at a wedding is the father of the bride. The reason for this is that the father of the bride is probably masking his feelings of loss with humor.
Here is what a funny toast coming from the father of the bride may look like.
"Honey, you know I love your Mom, right? So I know you will understand me when I say I would like you to treat Randy the way your mother treated me, and still treats me to this day."
"We have been married for 28 years and you have never heard your Mom nag at me. So don’t nag Randy. Just glare at him when you find him eating those sweet things that he is not supposed to eat, just like what your mother does when she catches me stealing cookies from the kitchen. Kick at him from under the dinner table when he says something inappropriate, like what your mother does to me."
"Most of all, the two of you should never go to bed without resolving whatever arguments you and Randy may have during the day. Who needs sleep when arguing is more fun?"
"Randy, whenever Sarah does all these things to you, just be patient and take it all in stride. That is what husbands always do."
"But as ridiculous as all these may seem to both of you, what I am trying to say is that be patient with each other and learn to live with the differences that married life will bring to the two of you. I love you both and I truly hope that you would stay happy, always."
Funny wedding toasts are also a nice way to lighten up the wedding ceremony.
Also, very nice wedding vows for you.